Consulting, Coaching & Chatter

I visited a church recently … a LARGE church … that everyone told me was so edgy when it came to technology. To say I was disappointed would be an understatement and it prompted me to write the following article that appeared in the Easum, Bandy & Associates On Track Ezine. I put the first paragraph below so you can decide whether you want to read it all or not.

Oh, and just a final note. This whole article was inspired by a conversation with Glenn Kelley at Church Medic (and Vinehosting). Thanks, Glenn!

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I visit a lot of churches. A lot. And because of who I am and what I do, I just can’t help it – I wear my consultant’s hat, at least a little bit. Over the past year, I’ve taken a particular interest in checking out how the church uses technology. I’ve visited a number of mega-churches, a number of soon-to-be mega-churches, middle sized churches, and small churches and one thing I’ve found in each one … none of them are using current technology in worship effectively, if at all.

In general terms of cutting-edge technology, let me quickly dispel some current misconceptions. Just because you have a website, even an attractive website, doesn’t mean you’re cutting edge technologically. Although a website with a memorable and easily found URL (and thus search-engine optimized) is no longer an option, most church websites are hopelessly outmoded and outdated. Web 2.0 is the new standard, not the next-best-thing of the future – and if you don’t know what Web 2.0 is, then my point is proved. If your site doesn’t support or include discussion groups, wikis, social networking opportunities, blogs, RSS feeds, and other user interactive opportunities, then your site is emphatically not Web 2.0.

Another serious misconception is that if you’re using an email list to notify members of what’s going on, then you’re communicating in the most effective way to the younger generations. Not so. Turns out that Baby Boomers are pretty tuned in to email still, but get younger than fifty and in general you just as well be sending your email to the black-hole of cyberspace. None of my adult children (the youngest is twenty-two and the oldest is thirty) even check email anymore. That’s so retro … except they don’t use that word anymore, making me so retro! (My son said the correct term is “Old school” … I knew that.)

<Read the whole article>

What happens when you leave your journal at home? You end up journaling on your blog instead. So, this post is a bit different than the norm. Still, it’s another side of who I am.

Reading in Luke 12 this morning, following the Moravian Daily Texts (my ethnicity is traced back to the Moravians, which explains a lot about why I love house church, evangelism, and Christmas). One particular passage jumped out at me:

47“That servant who knows his master’s will and does not get ready or does not do what his master wants will be beaten with many blows. 48But the one who does not know and does things deserving punishment will be beaten with few blows. From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked.

What intrigued me was verse 47: Those who know what Jesus demands and doesn’t do it … well, let’s just say that things aren’t going to go well for them. As I reflected on that verse my mind cast back to two things. First, all the things I know I’m called to do and don’t. I don’t pray as much as I’m called to. I don’t always respond to the Spirit’s nudgings when I feel them.

But as my mind casts around, I was struck by an image that haunts me. I work with literally dozens of Christian leaders across USAmerica who are “stuck” in churches that won’t budge an inch. Churches that have left their first love; that have turned their back on their community; and that are more focused on personal comfort and maintaining the status quo than they are about anything else. The haunting part is of the leaders of these churches … many of these, yea most of these, know exactly what needs to be done. They know what they’re called to do, whether that’s to confront the controllers or to leave the church to its own destruction and plant in better prepared soil. The thing is … they know. They know what Jesus has to say about those who won’t receive the word, and yet they don’t move for a variety of reasons, almost all of which have more to do with career than call, pensions rather than productivity, and funding instead of faithfulness.

If we’re going to transform churches, we have to spend the time doing the things we’re called to do, not the things that are convenient to do. We have to march forward with faithfulness in the face of fruitless foolishness by the bullies and the terrorists. We have to risk our pensions for the sake of being productive in the Kingdom’s work. No more babysitting, changing spiritual dirty diapers, burping badly behaved “believers,” or bottle feeding indolent adolescent “Christians.” Plant your flag. Draw your line in the sand. Take the first step. Be like one born of the Spirit … blowing wherever Jesus beckons … and he never beckons us to stay. We’re always on the go. If no one follows, then move on.

Some time ago, Martin Marty was quoted in Tom Clegg’s Lost in America that about 3000 people per day in the West (outside of the Bible Belt in the US South) leave the Christian faith – not the church, the faith. There really wasn’t much evidence outside of his work to support the contention … until last year. In 2007, for the first time in over a decade, the number of USAmericans professing to be Christian dropped from 82%, where it had sat quite comfortably for many years, to 79%. In addition, over the last 10 years, the belief in God dropped from 86% to 78%.

In Martin Marty’s study, the 3000 who were leaving the faith were not just leaving the church … that number has hung around 1 million per year for several years (it slowed a bit in 2007) … they were leaving Christianity. They were Christians yesterday and today they are … Buddhist, Muslim, Pagan, or a member of the fastest growing religions in the US – None.

Do some still “believe”? Probably. But many of the 3,000 have simply given up hope that Christianity has anything to offer. They went to church looking for God and all they found was “church.” They looked at the lives of those who called themselves Christians, even those who were faithful in going to church, and found people whose lives were fundamentally the same as theirs – they spend their money the same, live in the same style, have the same problems, talk the same talk, have the same addictions, and pretty much walk the same walk as they do – and so these former seekers wonder where the “full and meaningful life” that Jesus purportedly promised to his followers has gone … or has that, like all the miracles of the New Testament, ceased since the apostolic period?

It has been said that Bill Graham estimated that only 10 percent of all church goers were Christian … and one of my Christian Sociology professors said he thought Graham was an optimist.

And so, I encourage Christians in my small groups to go back to the Bible. Not the Old Testament … not the book of Revelation … but the Gospels and Acts, and after that wherever they feel led. Not because I think the Bible is to be lifted up, but because the vast majority of churches are not discipling people and the fact is, most people are going to have to get discipled in a small group setting. By getting people to read the scriptures, especially the Gospels, they have an opportunity to meet Jesus in ways most don’t meet Jesus in the church. Add the support of a discipleship small group that helps hold them accountable for prayer, faith-sharing, fasting, and the like, and people have an opportunity to find the relationship with Jesus we talk about so much. It’s not the Bible reading that changes lives, but discovering a relationship with the author. And since most people aren’t finding that in church, as witnessed clearly by the numbers, alternatives are desperately needed. As has been pointed out by Tom Bandy in the past, it takes about seven years to turn a church around … and 80% of all turnarounds fail … we simply don’t have time to wait anymore.

If you want to get an eyeful sometime, take a gander over to www.lettersfromleavers.com/blog. This is a website with letters from people who have left the church. In some cases, the words are angry and hurtful. In others, sorrowful and painful. Either way, it’s one place to get an idea of the reason why some people leave.

…though if we really want to know, there are literally millions upon millions of folks who have left the church out there. We could just ask.

Still on the road … and feeling pretty road weary. As we drive (I’m riding, Kris is driving) and I realized I hadn’t scheduled our radio show “Church Talk” for August yet. The one problem I have with BlogTalkRadio is that scheduling shows is a pain. On the other hand, I can’t complain about the cost. Anyway, Tom Bandy, my co-host, and I have scheduled our shows for the rest of the year both dates and topics. I’ve put them down below so you have an idea of what’s coming … for those who want to either tune in or call in.

• August 20:  Worship Wars
• September 10:  Follow-up
• October 22:  Holiday Hospitality
• November 26:  Holly or Holy: Keeping Holiday Sanity
• December 10:  Keeping on Message: Mission Integrity

BlogTalkRadio is one of the Internet’s best new technologies. In a nutshell, the BlogTalkRadio people allow you to host an online radio call-in show (you can phone in when we’re on the air at (347) 324-5923. IMHO, the church needs to take a good look at technology just like this. Our show has been popular enough that we’re hoping to offer the show weekly in 2009.

The sun’s going down over Illinois and we’re only three hours from home … if we don’t stop. So I’m going to turn my attention to my wife, which is always a good thing.

Over the years, it’s become clear to me that the single most difficult ministry in a local church is just that … singles. Those “College and Career” groups are literally just killer. Of course, one of my “answers” is always to focus on life-transforming small groups and then let the good times roll from that. In our experience … I checked with my bride, Kris who has as much or more experience in working with singles than I … although there are a number of reasons singles’ ministries are difficult, one of the biggest is over-programming and over-thinking. This is especially true for small groups. We want the “study” to be engaging and informing and filled with ice breakers so the group bonds. Yeah. Over-programming.

Instead of scheduling the small group time moment-by-moment, we suggest letting the small group time be a lot more free-flowing. Do something over a meal … always the ultimate ice breaker … and then get someone who’s been trained in Discipleship Small Groups (see the webinar recordings at www.easumbandy.com/store and upcoming live small group webinars or the upcoming training event in Palm Beach) and let it rip. In a nutshell, Discipleship Small Groups are focused around discipling using a curriculum that some have called a “non-curriculum.” The whole evening kicks off with a single question: “So, what have you read this week in scripture that intrigued you?” This will spark some interesting conversation, since the #1 answer will be “Huh?” followed by comments like “I tried to read through the Bible” and “I tried to read the Bible, but I just couldn’t understand what I was reading.” The facilitator helps the conversation along and typically doesn’t have a lot of answers … but the conversation tends to lively. There are other Discipleship Development questions that the facilitator can use to keep the conversation going, if needed, though in my experience this one question is lively enough for the evening (other questions include the likes of, “Who’s life did you intentionally touch in Jesus’ name?” and “Who did you encourage in their faith journey this week?”).

In week two, when the reading question is asked again, the conversation will be equally “Huh? I can’t believe you asked us again!” and the conversation will probably hinge on excuses and talk about how to fit spirituality practices into real life. By week three, though, people start sharing and the conversation become tailored to the group’s interests and whims. Other DD questions are introduced during the coming weeks, all of which are designed to raise the “Huh?” factor into consciousness and help stimulate discipleship behavior during the week.

The best thing about these kinds of small groups is that the singles (or anyone else doing them) set their own agenda overall. They can do these questions over pizza, at a club, while camping or skiing (at the lodge), and even keep in touch with the questions with those not there via SMS.

Is this the only answer for effective small groups? Hardly, but in our experience, it works out pretty well. Letting the small group set their own agenda within the context of becoming more effective in their faith walk seems to be a winner overall.

The other day, Heidi responded to my post on Expected Behaviors. She noticed I used the terms “Bully” and “Terrorist” and asked what the difference was … and what to do about them if they’re in your church.

Over the years, I’ve come to know four different kinds of people in the church. Disciples of Jesus Christ, Believers (who believe, but don’t behave like a disciple), Bullies, and Terrorists.

A bully is the kind of guy or gal who is determined to get their way come hellorhighwater. They’re the ones who get angry, bluster, get in your face, raise their voices, and so on. These people bluster their way through church meetings bent on either maintaining the status quo or changing things to suit their preferences. Left to their own devices, this kind of person could be the next YouTube video star as s/he punches out the board chair.

A terrorist is the kind of gal or guy who makes threats in order to get their own way. They’re the ones who threaten “If you don’t _______, then I’ll _______.” You can fill in the blanks in a myriad of ways, but here’s a couple of examples. “If you don’t remove the LCD Projector from the sanctuary my family and I will never come back.” or “If you don’t get rid of the drumset I’m going to withhold my tithe.” Sometimes these threats are more serious and include bodily harm or destruction of property.

Have you ever noticed that churches are the most tolerant organizations in the world? Sure, they may get uptight with a church or a group of people who are more liberal or conservative than they, but when it comes to putting up with bullies and terrorists, well, they not only tolerate them, they make excuses for them. “You know, he really has a good heart” and “Well, you know she doesn’t mean anything by it … that’s just Sue.” No other organization on earth, volunteer or professional, would put up with behavior like that. They’d be shown the door in no time flat.

So, what is the church’s recourse? The answer is to either Convert, Neutralize, or Remove them. Of course, it’s helpful if the church has an covenant of expected behaviors, but if not there’s still no excuse for putting up with bad behavior in the church.

Covert them: Two key leaders, preferably peers of the bully or terrorist, go see the offender and gently confront the person and their behavior. Point out the destructiveness of it. Press gently for repentance.

Neutralize them: Remove the offender from EVERY leadership position they may hold. Invite them to NOT come to board meetings, committee meetings, etc. Take them out of the information loop. Pass the word that the offender does NOT speak for the church, board, committee, etc. Take away their power in every possible forum.

Remove them: This is the most drastic, but frankly the most effective for some of these folks. If the above doesn’t work (and do try them first), then the board/council/session should make a decision to remove the person from membership, or barring that, from participation. Then the pastor and the board chair goes to the person and tells them that because of their ongoing behavior, they are no longer welcome at the church … that they need to find a new church if they’re going to attend. Let them know that if there is true repentance, the board will be happy to entertain a conversation with them, but until then, they may not return to the church or to churh functions.

In most cases, these three steps will alleviate the bully/terrorist problem in the church. In fact, when one bully/terrorist is defanged one way or another, the congregation will heave a sigh of relief and can focus on the future more effectively.

I didn’t used to be much of a blog reader, but after conversations with a couple of folk it became clear that blogging, reading, and responding are a social networker’s lifeblood … and since I always fancied myself as a social networker, I’ve started reading a couple.

I was reading Glenn Kelley’s blog this morning and came across an excellent bit on marketing the church. He offered ten bits of advice that include such simple ideas as birthday cards, bumper stickers, brochures, etc. You can read about it here. It may seem like there’s nothing new here, but what he says is not only excellent, but spot on.

Just a note from my own experience in marketing. One of the most powerful marketing tools that a church has available is the local media. Use your media outlets to get your message out. Now, the problem is, most churches send the radio station or newspaper PSAs (Public Service Announcements) on VBS, a special worship service, etc. and when they do, they’re looking for free advertising. But the media guys are looking for news. There’s a real shortage of good local news in most areas (major metro areas excepted) and they’re looking for good news bits to write stories on. The problem is, most churches aren’t doing things very newsworthy … and when they do, they miss the opportunity to toot their horn because they don’t think in terms of “news.”

A good News Release is worth a dozen good PSAs because they are focused on what they media desperately needs. News. So the key to good media marketing is to do something POSITIVE that makes news. Although the axiom “There’s no such thing as bad publicity” may be true for many businesses, it’s definitely NOT true of the church. We already have a lousy reputation in the public’s eye. Do something newsworthy and do something positive.

Gotta go to Pittsburg, so I’ll be on the road. We’ll see what “comes up” as we go and I’ll post from my Blackberry.

See you!

Today has been a Net Results kind of day. This issue’s theme is discipleship and I’ve had a lot of fun editing articles and adding graphics and doing all those things that a one-man shop does to get a magazine ready for release. One of the great things about all this, though, is reading what leaders from around the nation have written about discipleship. Gary Straub’s article on the devotional life is a litany of incredible devotional ideas. I especially liked his idea about “Waking Thoughts”:

I often find my waking thoughts contain dream fragments that offer guidance around people I need to pay attention to. I ask myself two questions before my feet hit the floor: What one thing must I accomplish today? and What must I definitely not do? Answering these questions provide the rails to guide my tracks in the morning.

One of the things Net Results is doing to help build subscribeship is to give away six month trial subscriptions, so if you aren’t subscribed yet, you can do so and read Gary’s upcoming article and a host of other great stuff as well.

I’m a big “DNA” fan, that is, I believe before a church can be effectively planted, before a church can grow, and before a church can be transformed (pick whichever category you find yourself in), the leaders and ultimately the congregation, have to wrestle with the “Why do we exist and what does it matter?” question. Once the grappling is over and the leaders emerge from the board room, they have a fully mapped congregational genome with 6 strands:

• Mission
• Compelling Vision
• Core Values
• Bedrock Beliefs
• Expected Behaviors
• Strategic Focus

That’s the order I always see the DNA Genome in, but that’s not the order I recommend tackling them if you’re having to work with an existing congregation.

In most congregations I’ve worked with, before any sort of transformation even begins, I help them develop their expected behaviors. Expected behaviors are how leaders and members of the congregation agree to treat each other. The final product is six to eight statements that become the core of a leadership covenant that is adopted by the official decision making body (board, council, session, etc.) and then is voted on by the congregation. Only when you have these in place can you expect to lead the congregation forward through the more difficult process of defining the rest of the DNA.

The process, in a nutshell, is to work through the One-Anothers (there are over 50 of them in the New Testament) in order to combine and condense them into a covenant. You will also want to include a reference to Jesus’ conflict resolution training in Matthew 18:15-17 as well as ensuring something gets put in there in terms of leaders being the models of the behaviors.

I’ve recently been working with a congregation in the transformational process and below is the Expected Behavior Covenant that they developed. It took a full four months, but here are the results.

Discipleship Behaviors

1. We will treat each other with respect and compassion, speaking honestly and taking the time to listen to one another.
2. We will joyfully accept and embrace all people into our midst, practicing generosity of our time, our abilities, our financial gifts and our prayers for each other.
3. We will pursue agreement through honest interaction and then speak well of resulting decisions by the church and its leaders to build trust in fulfilling the united mission of the congregation.
4. We will practice peacemaking by following the teaching of Matthew 18:15-17.
5. We will be faithful in regular worship attendance, small group bible study and prayer, growing in spirit and grace, so that we experience the life transforming movement of God’s Spirit within us.
6. Leaders will model these behaviors of discipleship, being of one heart and soul, by continuing to grow in spirit and grace, inspiring others to come alongside.

Once the behaviors are accepted by the congregation, the hard part actually begins … holding the bullies and terrorists accountable to the congregation’s agreed behaviors – though it’s a lot easier when you can say, “Bossy-Bob, we all agreed we wouldn’t speak to each other like that.” However, once you’ve called the bully on their behavior, you’ll hear a collective sigh of relief from the congregation at large.

This just about proves my point about the wonders of technology. Of course, I’m not running for office … this week … but the fact is this spoof was created using relatively “simple” end-user technology. The church has got to get serious with this stuff.

My thanks to Glenn Kelley from Vinehosting for his help in getting this video onto the site … oh, and putting this blog together in the first place.